Dan Byl

It is interesting to me, as I get older and I look at my friends, some have grown up way to fast, some refuse to grow up, some know how to have fun, and others are just trying to survive. But one thing that most of them have in common is a lack of passion. Maybe it is because we no longer have a universal cause that brings us all together, maybe it is because of video games, what ever the reason you can’t brush off the fact that it is killing us as a generation.

We don’t know how to be passionate about our beliefs, about a cause, about our lives. We are drifting through life, sailing on the achievements of people around us. As I stood in chapters looking at the books under the heading culture, one book caught my attention “The Dumbest Generation, by Mark Bauerlein.” I began to wonder if this is how we want to be remembered? Is this the trend we want to be remembered for setting?

I think that there is a parallel between this lack of passion and the emotional state of our generation. We are bombarded by information, by the pain of our world, by the emotions of everyone around us, by T.V. radio, music, the internet, we have no grid for dealing with these emotions and our personal lives all at the same time.

The generations before us were sheltered from the world. There were limited sources of information; there was one newspaper, one news channel, several radio stations, and the top 20. Now we have thousands of bands and songs at our finger tips , we have thousands of views of each and every event taking place on our planet at any given moment, we have a world of people telling us how to feel, what to think, and what to be, and these messages are scattered, there is no one way to think, no one way of doing things, we have to sift through a world of input.

“Technology has simplified our lives,” this may be true in the fact that technology has made our day to day physical tasks simpler and easier but it has done the very opposite to our emotional and mental lives. It has turned our world into the most complex theological minefield ever created.

It is no wonder that our generation has lost its drive and passion. We no longer know what to be passionate about, because there is no longer a common theme. We no longer know how to deal with our personal lives; we have turned to things that numb our minds that allow us to zone out and refrain from large amounts of input. In our pursuit of simplifying our world we have created a world of choices. There used to be only several ways to have your coffee in the morning, black, with sugar, with milk, now we stop by Starbucks and we have low fat, double foam triple shot, three pump of hazel nut espresso, with room at 185 degrees.

The possibilities are so endless that the process of existing has become so complicated and complex that we have begun to shut down to the world as an act of self-preservation. We have been forced to sacrifice passion for the ability to cope.

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This is a new word as far as I can tell, spell checker sure doesn’t like it. Ok what is it well lets break it down for all of those out there that looked at it and when what the heck. First we have Web, this would refer to the internet. Then we have etiquette. For all the guys out there no this is not French, its what your mother tried very hard to teach you as a young boy, to put it simply it’s proper behavior.

I want to put a quick list together to give you an idea of the does and don’ts, ok mostly don’ts of the web.

1. Don’t make your avatar, facebook profile picture or anyother picture that may be your image to the world something creepy.

2. Don’t be a moron, don’t post junk on peoples blogs, don’t leave ignorant comments on websites if you really have a problem then email the person in private.

3. Don’t spam

4. Don’t pass on spam (you won’t die)

5. If you post a link on someone’s blog make sure you post a link back to the site you just posted a link on. (links are the currency of the internet)

6. Don’t instigate arguments or petty tit for tat in the comments of a blog

7. Never tell private stories about your significant other without their expressed and written permission

8. Just like writing a book report in high school make sure you give credit to your sources

9. Check your sources out before you post something. (I got busted on this one)

10. Become a fan, this is the best way to build your web presence, just like the real world your stuff will be built by the people you help.

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Back to the idea of insight, where do you get your insight from? Who are you asking for advise and wisdom from? So I am going to share a few simple rules I follow trying to get insight and for finding people to glean wisdom from.

Rule 1, find people that are good in specific areas. For instance a good father, leader, business man, husband. Not many people are good at everything so go to specific people for specific issues. I got married and so I go to two individuals for advice on how to communicate and love my wife, both of these guys are married and have been for years, I don’t go to my single friends.

But I do go to my guy friends that are peers when I am trying to deal with some of my own personal issues, because they can relate and have slightly different views of similar issues.

Rule 2, they need to have a similar belief system as mine. They need to be following God and wanting to be good people. I don’t go to someone that thinks there is no god to help me with my life, why? Because God is a huge part of my life and to leave him out of the solution seems like a bad idea to me.

Rule 3, a mutual respect. I need the guys in my life that I go to, to be able to rebuke me, and be able to be willing to not push there ideas on me at the same time. Everything that people tell me I run through my filters and I apply to my life in a manner that will work for my personality and way of doing things. So if the man just wants to push his ideas down my throat the relationship wont work out.

Rule 4, I need to be able to have relationship with them out side of crises. We need to be able to just hang, play poker, or work together. We need to be able to get to know each other on a personal level before they can speak into my life. Just because you are in a place of authority dose not mean you have the right to speak in to my most personal issues. That permission needs to be earned and given.

Rule 5, there needs to always be more then one person. I will always go to more then one person when I am trying to figure things out or deal with things. More perspectives equal better chance of seeing all the angles.

Rule 6, I need to be going to God too.

Hope these are helpful, and remember take these and run them through your filter and apply what you can to yourself.

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Work ethic, lately I have been learning a lot about work, and rest. I got married last summer in July and had several jobs lined up to begin when I got back from my honeymoon. However when I returned home after a week with no connection to the outside world (something I recommend for that honey moon leave your phones at home and don’t check any emails or facebook) I found that all of the jobs had gone away along with our great economy. I found my self with almost no work for 6 months. But as the year was coming to a close so was my patience with not being able to work. I began to pray and even fasted for the first time in my life.

After praying, God began to teach me about what he was wanting from me. He wanted me to learn to trust my wife, he wanted me to learn how to be the emotional and spiritual support in our marriage. He wanted me to rest. Most of you know that I had some major surgery in February of last year, my body needed a rest. I found my self in a season of rest. My problem was that I don’t do nothing well. I fought rest with everything that was in me.God also told me that I would experience a change in the new year, and I have been working solid for a month now.

In the 6 months I didn’t have work I would jump at the opportunity to work for anyone no matter the wage. I am not trying to brag, just make a point, by jumping at any opportunity that presented itself I build relationship with a group of men that are more notable in my profession then I am. And that is where all my steady work is coming from now. I gave God room to build my reputation and relationships. And this in turn has opened doors that God can provide work for me through.

I know that times are hard but if you aren’t willing to jump at any opportunity and are only willing to do what you want, It may take a lot longer for God to be able to open the doors that he would other wise be able to work through. A wise man said to me that 10$ an hour working is better then 8$ an hour on employment insurance. Are you willing to work hard now for what may seem like nothing, in order to build relationships and reputation that may help you out significantly in the long run?

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I know I am using big Christianese words, I only say that because I came across a phrase the other day that I had to ask my counselor what it meant. I did not do well in English as you may have figured out from my writing so far but hey, we all need to start somewhere.

On a totally unrelated side note if you write a blog and think it is worth reading send me the link, I will check it out and post a link for a couple days.

Back to my story about discernment, this is a good’er. So I was sitting on the can as I so often do and had nothing to read so I started going through the collection of books on the back of the toilet. Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch caught my attention. So I started to read through the introduction, I couple phrases caught my attention and I had this tight naught feeling in my stomach, oops I should let you know I was off the can by this point. The story just started there. So I called up one of my mentors and asked if he had heard of the author or the book, he said he hadn’t but he would ask my pastor who he was having dinner with conveniently. While I was waiting for him to call me back I decided to Google the author.

Apparently this guy is cookoo, and is passing his stuff off as Christian. He was not having a conversation with God at all but with a spirit guide passing himself off as God.

I have to admit that when I found out that my gut was telling me not to read the book I had in front of me and I listened it made me feel good about myself. When we listen to our intuition, sometimes it may seem like we are missing out but in the long run the rewards are much better then anything we may have missed. Are you listening to that small voice, or that tight feeling in your gut, or what ever else it is that might be telling you “not to go there? We don’t have to prove anything to anyone, we just need to listen to God when he tells us to duck and run.

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Do you ever feel like you really don’t like yourself? If you had the option you wouldn’t spend time with you? I feel this way much to often. I really messed up a couple weeks ago and since then I have withdrawn from many of my relationships. I have pulled away from my wife and I walk around with this dark rain cloud hanging over my head.

How do I change this? That is the question that I have been asking now for a couple weeks. I don’t want to pull away from the people that support me and what to build me up, but I am.

The solution as far as I can tell is God. “Wow that’s deep, way to go mr. Christian.” Yes that is really how I feel about that statement. But I do need to go to God, I need to see my self through his eyes, I need to allow him to fill my thoughts with his views of me. I need to stop dwelling on my limited perspective.

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