Dan Byl

As I sat in Starbucks, I was maybe eavesdropping just a little bit on the two forty something women talk about men and relationships. It was really sad actually, listening to them one was divorced and looking, and the other was married and I would say unhappy.

The married lady was bashing her husband, and the clothes he wore and the haircut he has. He had dyed his hair and I guess the woman thought that this was the sure sign of a mid life crises. She though he was ridiculous, he had gone to the tanning salon and was apparently not acting his age. What does that even mean acting your age. Does it mean accepting your age, and if that happens to be over forty that you are old, and should be trying to retire and working all the time.

North American culture is a trap, you have all your fun when you are young, then you spend your life trying to make as much money as you can so that at some point when you are to old to really enjoy it be looked after and have some semblance of freedom. I know that I have no desire to follow this pattern. Taking on all the responsibilities that we are supposed to have if we are to be grown up in the worlds eyes.

It was sad to here this woman bash her man because he wanted to have fun in his life. She mocked his ideas and emasculated this man in the presence of her friend. These two woman sat there and talked about men and there baggage. I am sorry but when I hear two women sit and talk like they were I have to wonder who has the baggage.

I am glad that I have a woman in my life that wont talk bad about me behind my back. That doesn’t mean that she wont ask friends for help in dealing with my issues and I have many issues. But what it means is that she loves me and wants me to be able to live the life I want and she won’t stop me, she won’t bash my horrible and dangerous ides. She supports me and she loves me and she laughs at me.

And when we treat the people in our lives this way, it is all to often reciprocated.

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